“Be nice” is something children hear often. We say it when siblings argue over a toy, when a classmate feels left out, or when an excited child says something hurtful without realizing it. For a young child, these two words can leave a lot unexplained. What does being nice look like when you are disappointed? How do you include someone who wants to play a different game? What can you do when you have hurt a friend’s feelings?
Kindness becomes more meaningful when we help children practice it in specific, everyday ways. For Christian families and educators, these moments are also opportunities to show children how loving our neighbors shapes the way we treat people.
Make Kindness Something Children Can See
Children need examples they can understand and repeat. Instead of simply saying, “Be kind to your friend,” try naming the action: “Let’s make room so she can sit with us,” or “He dropped his crayons. Would you help him pick them up?” These small explanations connect an abstract value with something a child can actually do. Adults can model the same behavior by thanking someone for their help, listening without interrupting, and apologizing when we make a mistake. When children see kindness practiced by people they trust, they have examples to draw from in their own interactions.
Teach Sharing With Patience
Sharing can be especially difficult when a child is deeply involved in building, drawing, or pretend play. Wanting to keep a favorite toy does not mean a child is unkind. It means there is an opportunity to teach consideration alongside patience and clear communication. Try helping children use phrases such as, “You can have a turn when I’m finished,” or “Can we use these together?” The child who is waiting needs support, too. An adult might say, “Waiting is hard. Let’s find something you can do while you wait.”
This approach gives both children something to practice: respecting another person’s turn and following through when it is time to share.
Help Children Work Through Disagreements
A peaceful classroom is not one where children never disagree. It is one where they receive guidance as they learn to handle disagreements respectfully. The National Association for the Education of Young Children describes a caring preschool community as one where teachers help children learn to play, work together, and make friends. That work includes helping children navigate the moments when getting along is difficult.
When a disagreement happens, begin by helping children settle enough to listen. Then put words to the problem: “You both wanted the same truck.” Give each child a chance to speak and help them consider a next step. They might take turns, find another truck, or create a game together. Kindness does not require children to agree about everything. It asks them to treat one another with care while finding a way forward.
Practice Noticing Who Needs a Friend
Including others often begins with noticing them. A child standing near a game may want to join but feel unsure how to ask. A new classmate may need someone to explain where the supplies belong. Adults can gently draw attention to these moments: “I wonder if she would like to build with you. Shall we ask?”
Children can also practice simple invitations: “Would you like to play?” or “There’s room here.” In a Christian learning environment, these actions make the idea of loving our neighbors tangible. Children begin to understand that care extends beyond their closest friends.
Leave Room to Make Things Right
Children will have unkind moments. What matters is helping them take responsibility and try again. An apology is a beginning. Ask, “What could you do to help?” Returning a toy, rebuilding a knocked-over tower, or checking on a friend gives children a practical way to repair harm.
At Foundations Academy, our Christian values help shape how we learn and grow together. Everyday moments offer opportunities to practice patience, compassion, and respect. Schedule a tour of Foundations Academy in Port St. Lucie to learn more about our caring, faith-centered school community.
